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Tralasciando che sono Imperiale e poi adoro la GI, stiamo paragonando un figo che ha ucciso uno squalo di sabbia, una creatura gigantorme, A MORSI, dopo che lo stesso squalo gli aveva tranciato praticamente tutta la parte sinistra del corpo, e una... checca... che va girando come l'idiota in modi sfarzosi.
Sinceramente, mi pare chi il voto sia dato a prescindere al Colonnello "Ho ucciso uno Squalo di Sabbia a Morsi"/ "Vance Stubbs è il mio pokerbuddy"/ "posso stuprarmi i carri da solo"/ "Hai visto Ghazghkull? Lui in confronto a me è una fighetta!"/ "I Demoni mi fanno una sega"/ "Le Eldar hanno un fan club su di me, modestamente" Straken.
"MA DEVO FARE SEMPRE TUTTO IO?! ANDIAMO, VI FARO' VEDERE IO COME SI FA!" (cit. catchphrase di Staken)
Straken - The Real Straken (versione IMPERIALE di Eminem - The Real Slim Shady)
Y'all act like you never seen a bionics person before
jaws all on the floor like Sanguinius, like Horus just burst in the door
and started whippin' his ass worse than before
they first were primarch, throwin' his over the starship
It's the return of the... "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding
He didn't just do what I think he did, did he?"
and the Emprah said... nothing, you idiots
the Emprah's dead, he's locked in my golden throne
xenos women love Straken
"Chigga chigga chigga Colonell Straken, I'm sick of him
Look at him, walking around grabbing his you-know-what
Flipping the you-know-who," "Yeah, but he's so badass though"
Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
But no worse than what's going on in your commanders' bedroom
Sometimes I wanna get on the frontline and just let loose, but can't
But it's cool for the Orks to hump a dead moose
"My fist is on your jaw, my fist is on your jaw"
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know what a slaaneshi's clitoris is
Of course they're gonna know how kill an heretics
By the time they hit 4th grade
They've got the Cadian Gate, don't they?
"We ain't nothing but guardsmen" -- well, some of us are heretics
Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
But if we can hump dead xenos and witches
Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
girls wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes!
I'm Ironhand Straken, yes I'm the real Straken
All you other Strakens are just imitating
So won't the real Straken please stand up?
Please stand up, please stand up? (x2)
Creed don't gotta cuss to kill his foes
Well, I do. So fuck him and fuck you too!
You think I give a damn about a medal?
Half of you commanders can't even stomach me, let alone stand me
"But Strak, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"
Why? So you guys could just lie to get me to the front line
So you can sit me here next to Creed?
Shit, Pask better switch me chairs
So I can sit next to Harker and Sly Marbo
And hear 'em argue over who kills more
Little bitch put me on blast on the jungle beats
"Yeah, he's badass, but I'm the tactical genius, hee-hee"
I should kill a Warboss and his boyz
And show the whole world how you gave Straken V.D
I'm sick of you little Eldar and Tau groups, all you do is annoy me
So I have been sent here to destroy you!
And there's a million of us just like me
Who kill like me; who just don't give a fuck 'bout commanders like me
Who cuss like me; walk, talk and act like me
And just might be the next best thing but not quite me!
I'm Ironhand Straken, yes I'm the real Straken
All you other Strakens are just imitating
So won't the real Straken please stand up?
Please stand up, please stand up? (x2)
I'm like a miniature of the Emprah, cause I'm only giving you
Things you joke about with your comrades inside your briefing room
The only difference is I got the balls to kill it
In front of y'all and I don't gotta be false or coward at all!
I just get on the shotgun and kill it
And whether you like to admit it, I just shit it
Better than 90% of you colonels out can
Then you wonder how can kids eat up these litanies like Valiums
It's funny; cause at the rate I'm going, when I'm 30
I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting
Pinching medicaes' asses when I'm jacking off with Jergens
And I'm jerking but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working!
And every single person is a Straken lurking
He could be working at the frontline, spitting on your mission's plan
Or in the Russes parking lot, circling
Screaming "I don't give a fuck"
With his windows down and his system up!
So, will the real Straken please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go!?
I'm Ironhand Straken, yes I'm the real Straken
All you other Strakens are just imitating
So won't the real Straken please stand up?
Please stand up, please stand up? (x2)
Edited by PunkNeverDie110 - 20/3/2013, 18:30
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